Your Logistic Robots Are Broken! [Forum Game]

[olafthecat]

PLS sticky this topic!

[QGamer]

The robots don't have any tasers because you forgot to put the passive provider chest inside the network. And the defiant robots are not back in line, instead they are flying in circles.

PLS sticky this topic!

The robots also bring you some glue and stick you to the ground so you can't move. And they glue the A4 paper to your arm.

I request a car and 5 stacks of rocket fuel so I can drive to the other side of the planet and escape the logistic network.

[olafthecat]

The robots combine two of the most amazing items in the game, the rocket and the car, to create a rocket car.
It is capable of exceeding mach 2.
When topped up with rocket fuel, it can circulate the planet.
When you get in and start the engine, it also triggers the powerful rocket boosters, thrusters and RCS units, accelerating you to top speed in under a second, crushing you against the seat, causing your bones to disintegrate, your blood to boil and your organs to turn into liquidified meat.
This obviously kills you, instantly, and because of this slight handicap, you get to miss the most amazing thing anyone will ever experience.
Traveling at these ridiculous speeds mean that even a pebble out of place can cause your roaring machine of death and the world of Factoria has plenty of those.
It also has trees, big rocks and very angry aliens.
What you crash into is not any of those things, it is a wooden ramp.
Created by a long lost civilization before the biters, spitters and worms, this is the only object that remains of their existence.
When your car of mass destruction hits it, which it does about 1 millisecond after launch, it goes flying up in the air, turning the ramp into dust and not only sending your car into orbit, but into space.
Your car at this point is going at escape velocity, so it will never see this planet again and neither will you.
You have finally reached space and yet you will never be able to witness it.
Let's start again from scratch.

I request a furnace and a burner miner to get you started.

EDIT: This is perhaps my longest post yet!
EDIT: This post is number 130!

[TRUEpicness]

nothing happens because there are no bots and there are no drills or furnaces in storage or passive provider chests

i request the there is no spoon achievement

[olafthecat]

You wake up in a vat full of sour smelling chemicals, with wires plugged into every part of your body...
I think you know what happens next

I request the staff of epic film references!

[TRUEpicness]

the robots start their journey to fulfill your request

they'll be back...


i request short circuit 3 (film)

[Impatient]

But the robots compute "To heck with that." We rather bring "Surrogates". Because we want to be like humans. We actually can not be like humans, but we try to get as close as possible by showing the appearance of Bruce Willis and let us be controlled by Bruce Willis.

This all makes as much sense as a human wanting to be like a robot and therefor dressing like a robot and allowing to be controlled by a computer.

Bruce, hearing from earth that there are robots somewhere, willing to bring at least something, requests duct tape and a fresh undershirt.

[TRUEpicness]

the robots bring the duct tape and the undershirt to bruce...
but they find bruce banner instead, and because floating robots annoy him he turns into the hulk and destroys them all

i request Thor to punish the hulk

[olafthecat]

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Well......not what you asked for, BUT EAT IT!

I request snazzy new UI: https://www.factorio.com/blog/post/fff-212

[QGamer]

The robots bring you a snazzy new UI, as you requested. But it's a new UI for Microsoft word instead of Factorio!

I request a Productivity Module 3.

[olafthecat]

The robots bring you a cup of coffee and 2 biscuits

I request 100 stack inserters

[Jap2.0]

The bots interpert your request as 100 stacks of inserters, and bring you the inserters from various crucial points in your factory.

I request 4 personal roboports mk. 2, a portable fusion reactor, modular armor mk. 2, and 100 construction bots to help clean up the mess.

[Impatient]

after you cleaned up everything, you think "nice, but boring", save the game and order the robots to bring you a rocket launcher and 100 nukes ... to test which parts of your factory are non-critical.

[olafthecat]

The robots bring you your nukes, but one of them is accidentally dropped from their claws and donates.
This causes a chain reaction of nuclear explosions which destroys most of your base, leaving you, dead, at the epicentre of the explosion.
I request Darth Vader's lightsabre, because reasons I don't want to explain, or maybe there are none, I don't know.

[Sigma1]

They get you a very light aluminium sabre. However, it has been manufactured poorly and gets dented if you hit anything.

I request a better GPU.

[The Eriksonn]

The robots bring you a gpu, but it is an Alien gpu and does not fit into any computer whatsoever.
It probebly was a good one though...

I request 1k of all science bottles

[Naviaux]

While waiting to collect the space packs from the silo, the rocket blows up before it can launch, causing you base to be wiped out.

I request 10 stacks of rocket fuel.

[Masterfox]

The Rocket Fuel is still burning when the bots get it, so they melt(It is not jet fuel...) and crash into the landscape.
I request a hose and a pump to extinguish the fires.

[foodfactorio]

The Rocket Fuel is still burning when the bots get it, so they melt(It is not jet fuel...) and crash into the landscape.
I request a hose and a pump to extinguish the fires.

one of the bots survived the melting from earlier, but its cpu is damaged...
it interprets your request as a Horse and brings one to the nearest burning tree.
it keeps flying up and landing back down on the horses back to try and entice it to extinquish the fire

i request a viable solution regarding how to use up 16 Angel Warehouses full of solid fuel

[olafthecat]

You request your logistic bots to drop nukes on them...

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KABOOM!!!!
I request a rocket to get off this destroyed planet.
EDIT: This is my 200th post!