The Automated Factory song (thanks to Gilbert & Sullivan)

[Acarin]

Following a side-post on the Steam forums, it turns out that KatherineOfSky is a fan of Gilbert & Sullivan. Here, therefore, is my original verse, expanded out to a full stanza - especially for you

I am the very model of an automated factory
I've information of all kinds (including light refractory)
I know the complex recipes and all the fast belt trickery
But now I need to build a lot of complicated rocketry!

I am very well acquainted too with matters mathematical
I know Boolean logic and solutions to quadraticals
About binomial theorem I could post a brand new theory
But circuit networks fry my brain and break my main bus, clearly

I'm very good at smelting ore and pumping fluids flammable
My biter campaigns rival those of good old General Hannibal
In short, for things logistical or loosely termed as "military"
I am the very model of an automated factory

In fact, when I know what is meant by "S/R Latch" and "memory"
When I can understand a post by Siggboy or that XKnight guy
When I can build a SmartTrain line and follow red wire tracery
And when I know exactly what is meant by "1-tick latency"

When I know how to braid my belts and how to count inventory
When I know how to use my bots, and how to plan a smeltery
When I have watched a thousand hours of YouTubers on "strategy"...
I'll be the very model of an automated factory!

[ssilk]

[KatherineOfSky]

Oh Acarin, this is ABSOLUTELY WONDERFUL! I laughed so hard singing it to myself! hahaha

After you posted the verse last night, I went to bed with songs in my head! Here's what I came up with (from the opposite perspective): Enjoy!

With bitery tread,
Through the forest green;
Pollution all 'round,
So swiftly do we ease!
No sound at all,
We never speak a word,
Our prize teeth forward
To chew you!

Tarantara, tarantara!
So stealthily the biters creep,
While all the fact'ry soundly sleeps.

Come, friends, who eat machin'ry,
Gnaw at all the power poles,
Entertain migration goals;
It's time to wreck this complicated...
.. and efficient factory!

[Acarin]

Oh, good job! This could turn into a regular "Factorio G&S" thread, lol

[mooklepticon]

Some of my favorite versions.

ReBoot - Season Three Opera https://youtu.be/V--_1hUvkh8

Animaniacs - I am the very model of a Cartoon Individual https://youtu.be/P1Zy6UcA8GA

[Acarin]

A wand'ring Biter I, a thing of teeth and patches
and claws to give you scratches
and icky, slimy nests
My catalogue is vast, with every kind of Spitter
To blow up every splitter
And vanish all your chests
(and vanish all your chests)

Are you in fire-breathing mood?
I'll die for you!
Oh sorrow, sorrow!
On pollution's spread do you brood?
I'll do so too!
Oh sorrow, sorrow!
I'll storm your granite wall
And watch while hundreds fall
Before your might
Ohhhh sorrow!

But if artifacts are really what is wanted
We've artifacts in piles lying 'round
All you have to do is come out to the forest
And pick them up - they're lying on the ground!
Our Biter boys in circled ranks assemble
All are ready now to rush out in a pack
And the number of us sets the ground a-tremble
As venturing forth we make another attack!

[BlackHat]

Wow there really needs to be a +1 button or a Thanks button!!! These verses are fantastic!

[ChurchOrganist]

Brilliant stuff!

But wouldn't this have a better home in Fan Art???

[KatherineOfSky]

Oh, my name is Kovarex, a dev'er
I've worked on Factorio forever,
With bots that are best
And ever-filled chests
Coding and design so clever.
If any one anything lacks
He'll find it all ready in stacks
You've but to build more on our endless floor,
After chopping trees with a pick-axe.

We've a first-class assortment of splitters
And a large production of ammo
To deal with those pesky spitters
And make their bases go "whammo!"

Colored belts, we've quantities of them
And for research if any one burns
We're causing an addiction, a heartfelt addiction
Anyone building fact'ries learns!

Thus we can build or die, protect our yellow guy
Pushing the furnace melts onto conveyor belts
Our plans to fruition: let's craft ammunition,
All for one condition, we must win the mission!

Add the new fluid wagon; so tired our feet are draggin'.
Celebrate YouTube hypes, bug-fix the forum gripes,
And with such joy we jump, coding new water pump.
And every Friday, we
Publish our notes with resplendent efficiency

Oh, if any one anything lacks
He'll find it all ready in stacks
You've but to build more on our endless floor,
After chopping trees with a pick-axe.

[Acarin]

Excellent job, Katherine!! (Although I had to simultaneously laugh and wince at "whammo", lol)

Kudos for picking a very hard meter to re-write, as well as one of the lesser-known G&S patter songs - it's from The Sorceror, isn't it?

[ChurchOrganist]

it's from The Sorceror, isn't it?

Indeed it is

John Wellington Wells entrance to the proceedings

I was MD for a local amateur performance of the Sorcerer about this time last year.

Nearly caused me to have a nervous breakdown - but the result was worth it.

The guy who played Mr Wells in our production portrayed him as a Wideboy with a South London accent - very funny

[Acarin]

Strange adventure, fact'ry building
On a planet fierce and wild
(Fierce and, fierce and, fierce and wild)
All pollution is forgotten
As I sit here, quite beguiled
(Quite be-, quite be-, quite beguiled)

That pollution spreads a red cloud
Makes the natives form a big crowd
Squeal and chitter, spawn more critters,
Trigger klaxons, very loud!
(Very, very, very loud!)

Strange adventure that we're playing
Modest game but awesome theme
(Awesome, awesome, awesome theme)
Now that it has been downloaded
From that portal there on Steam
(There on, there on, there on Steam)

Build conveyors, do some mining,
Then the smelters for refining
Ore to plates, with circuits shining,
Trains to Rockets, all are seen!
(All are, all are, all are seen!)

[KatherineOfSky]

Acarin, I keep meaning to write -- your verses are simply brilliant! And the way you fit in the Factorio theme is just marvelous! (I think you are a fair sight better than I at coming up with magical rhymes!

It's cool to discover so many other people who like G&S!

[ChurchOrganist]

Well I have a chorus.....

My object all sublime
I shall achieve in time
To make the factory so sublime
The factory so sublime.
And make each biter small
A Behemoth all in all.
Pollution carries the wherewithal
It carries the wherewithal

Anyone like to have a go at verses?

[Acarin]

Ooh, a challenge! I like a challenge and I will thus set to work on this when I'm back home ( currently away at a friend's birthday party weekend)

[ssilk]

This is no challenge, it's a kind of art.
More of this is welcome (of course),
but keep the standards high for every verse.

I move this from General to Art, leaving a link,
so that everybody can find it - and probably like it.

[Acarin]

Okay, let's try this on for size:

A better Factorio player has never
Upon this planet been
To nobody second
I'm certainly reckoned
The best you've ever seen
It is my very humane endeavour
To make, to some extent,
Each challenging issue
A wired-up tissue
Of circuits without incident

My object all sublime
I shall achieve in time
To make the factory so sublime
The factory so sublime
And make each Biter small
A Behemoth all in all
Pollution carries the wherewithal
It carries the wherewithal

The player who sends out a blueprint string
With pipes that are out of place
Will have it reposted
By Admins who've boasted
His hand couldn't find his face
The furnace line setup which doesn't seem able
To turn its hand to steel
Will use some inserters
And diverse converters
(Enough to make you reel)
The red wire network that always refuses
To broadcast the signals right
Will end up rewired
To items coal-fired
That only start working at night!

My object all sublime
I shall achieve in time
To make the factory so sublime
The factory so sublime
And make each Biter small
A Behemoth all in all
Pollution carries the wherewithal
It carries the wherewithal

The oil refinery stalling production
And stopping all the Lube
Its inputs I've set up
So there is no let up
Of water down the tube
The module assembler that eats all the circuitry
Leaving none for the rest
Its doom is assured
The problem is cured:
I've wired it up on "test"
The outpost, connected by train line and pylon,
Which ships back my copper and coal
Is causing more spawning
Through much global warming
But that's my eventual goal!

My object all sublime
I shall achieve in time
To make the factory so sublime
The factory so sublime
And make each Biter small
A Behemoth all in all
Pollution carries the wherewithal
It carries the wherewithal

[KatherineOfSky]

Oh that's simply marvelous!

ChurchOrganist & Acarin, you make a fantastic poetical duo! The rhymes are very intricate and quite enjoyable!

[Acarin]

Thank you for your kind words, Katherine This is entertaining me although, the more I look at that last piece, the more I am thinking that it was originally a 20-line stanza and not 15. I need to go back to the original song and check, I think, as it is bugging me now...

[olafthecat]

Nice