Factorio Forums

Captain Taz wrote:The construction bot is nowhere to be found, as a biter has eaten it.

I request 300 crude oil barrels.

As your bots are flying to you with the crude oil, they start crashing into eachother, causing them to all drop the oil and then lighting it ablaze.

I request some better logistic bots

Your requested logistic bots come to you at lightning fast speed, but your old ones got jealous and dropped a grenade on their (personal) roboport, killing them all as well as you.

I request enough materials for a train system that connects all my outposts and bases together!

They give it to you but you can't hold it and die form overexertion while building the tracks.

I request 150 iron plates

So the robots pick the iron plates, and the iron shorts their circuits.
I request 1000 repair packs to fix the little bastards

While they are brining the repair packs to you, they run into rocks on the way, damaging themselves. You end up with 1 repair pack and 2 robots.

I want them to bring me materials so I can build 10,000,000 logistic robots.

They find the robot chassis required, but after getting bored and flicking through Terminator in nanoseconds due to the fact that they are computers, they turn the chassis into more logistics robots which get more chassis and eventually you have an infestation of self-replicating bots that tear everything apart for resources to make more bots. They find you and kill you, still muttering about finding Sarah Conner.

I ask for them to bring 2M Iron so I can break them with grenades when they get close.

because of heavy damage and no repairs, your bots lose controls and ram your steam engines, leaving your base powerless. only left some pieces of iron plates.
i use my blueprint to order my construction bots to make a triple row of walls/turrets with pole and lights

Still thinking about Sarah Connor and where she might be, the robots build a stone pathway instead of a triple row of walls and turrets with poles and lights.

I tell the bots to build a time machine so they can send one of their brethren back in time to kill Sarah Connor. The first items needed are 37 wood, and 3 yellow inserters.

The robots mess up your request, and instead bring 3 wood and 37 yellow inserter.
I want someone to play multiplayer with

the bots didnt interprete your request, and bring you 3 dozens of big bitters to play with you
i request 50 processors for the time macine to kill Sarah Connor

Getting sick and tired of being hunted by these damn robots, I secretly hack the processors and add new code that tells them to stop chasing me, but instead they must find the one called "Neo".

I order the bots to stop building a time machine, and order them instead to build some science labs to research virtual reality.

Safe at last, bloody robots.

*The logistic robots build some science labs.
...
*The logistic robots realise they aren't construction robots.
I request advanced circuits

Since the robots are colorblind they give you processing units instead.

Then your factory goes into overdrive to try to regain the lost materials.

The factory then explodes because of overheating.

You end up with 2 burned and useless processing units and no advanced ones.


I request 200 stack inserters to replace the normal ones at my train station.

Because your robots have been told to find Neo, they go and do that instead, bringing you nothing. They find Neo and then bring your self-lighting grenades because they have no charge and thus no memory, causing the grenades to explode in your face, killing you.


I want them to bring me a revive pack and a reprogramming interface so I can reprogram them.

Well, the robots found a program interface, but it is not compatible to program the robots.
I request a big worm

They bring you the Biterzilla version of a behemoth worm, and it kills you.


I want them to bring me....... Not broken logistic robots.

The robots interpret the request as "everything except broken robots" and because there are no broken robots the robots takes everything, including your factory and other robots.
When they are done you are under a huge pile of parts that previously was your factory, and you suffocate to death.

I request 50 blueprints to reconstruct the factory again, except with 5% more combinators(and when people ask why I say "why not ")

the robot get the request but deliver it to the closest nest, and got eaten

i request a coffee machine , a cup , some milk and sugar.. i need energy with all that work waiting me to fix all that s..t these bots always do
...and a toilet... i need a break ..(ps: dont forget the news paper)

aRatNamedSammy wrote:the robot get the request but deliver it to the closest nest, and got eaten

i request a coffee machine , a cup , some milk and sugar.. i need energy with all that work waiting me to fix all that s..t these bots always do
...and a toilet... i need a break ..(ps: dont forget the news paper)

The robots bring you your coffee but they accidentally spill it on your lap.

I request 10 tanks with fuel and ammo

The robots grab the tanks and start flying them over to you, however the cables holding them come lose and the tanks start falling from the sky full of fuel and ammo. Needless to say it sounds like world war 3 going on throughout your base as the tanks hit the ground, explode on flames which then sets off the cannon shells and destroys anything in a huge radius around them.

I request 10 locomotives!