Any help with my Factorio fanfiction?

Things that are not directly connected with Factorio.
Post Reply
gentlemensin
Manual Inserter
Manual Inserter
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Dec 26, 2022 3:15 am
Contact:

Any help with my Factorio fanfiction?

Post by gentlemensin »

I'm writing a fanfiction about Space Exploration. In the first chapter, main character Giuseppe attempts to ram a big biter with a hauler. Note that big biters shouldn't have appeared yet. This particular big biter is sentient and jumps out of the way before cussing out Giuseppe. I would like the biter's rant, pictured in the quote below, to be a bit longer and have a better ending, hence this post. I apologize if the vulgar nature of the rant violates the forum rules.
And oh boy, did it cuss him out. Giuseppe stared in disbelief as the biter spoke a mile a minute, hurling creative insult after creative insult. “DID YOUR BRAIN GET RAPED, SCHEISERSHIT?! DID YOU OVERDOSE ON DUMB FUCK JUICE?! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCKBEANS DO YOU THINK YOU’RE DOING?!”

Kyralessa
Filter Inserter
Filter Inserter
Posts: 392
Joined: Thu Sep 29, 2016 5:58 pm
Contact:

Re: Any help with my Factorio fanfiction?

Post by Kyralessa »

Have you considered just saying that it cussed him out, without needing to explicitly spell out the nature of the language? Why not let the reader imagine for him/herself what kind of curses a big biter might utter?

mmmPI
Smart Inserter
Smart Inserter
Posts: 2028
Joined: Mon Jun 20, 2016 6:10 pm
Contact:

Re: Any help with my Factorio fanfiction?

Post by mmmPI »

I thought the sentient biter could cuRse the player:

Have you lost your nest ? Or too much redundancy in your genealogy ?
You carbon-smelling dirt digger, May you crash in a tree and your boiler run out of energy !

What is the audience for your fan fiction ? i have other ideas but it's not something i'd like to promote unless it is clear it's all joke. I think most insults come from differences when it's not calling the other inferior ( which could be while refering to those diferences) so it would make sense to me that the biter insult the birth process of humans,and their addicition to energy and shuffling dirt to find some. It could also go toward mocking the engineer who is the unique representant of his specie in game or his small size and strengh compared to the biter and the fact that humans can become biter's food.

All in one go :

You insignificant piece of unprotected flesh wouldn't even feed my flock for a full day, we'd need your family there for desert.

(but that's a really mean biters then).

Post Reply

Return to “Off topic”